The quote above comes in a story about Elisha. The backstory is that a woman showed Elisha great kindness and he returned the favor by calling on the Lord to have her bear a son even though she and her husband were of old age (sound familiar?). She has the son, but then he gets sick and dies. The woman goes to Elisha terribly upset because she didn’t ask him to gift her with a son in the first place and so essentially it’s because of Elisha and his “kindness” that she needs to live through the grief of losing her child.
Turns out, Elisha, who’s got a super connection to God, doesn’t get any special “prophet” download about how the situation has fallen apart. Instead, when the woman comes and grabs hold of his feet, at first Elisha’s servant Gehazi tries to pull her away, but Elisha says, “Let her alone, for she is in bitter distress; the Lord has hidden it from me and has not told me.” He really takes it in stride. He’s so matter of fact. He doesn’t dwell on the fact that for whatever reason God didn’t tell him, while at the same time his acknowledgment of the lack of communication affirms the fact that God could have told him, but didn’t. He wastes no time feeling offended, but goes straight to trying to remedy the situation, finally bringing the son back to life through laying on him (the meaning of which I’ve marveled at in another blog post you can check out here).
Anyway, what does this have to do with the launch of my Kickstarter campaign!? For whatever reason, the reality of life in this world involves some “divine downloads” and some walking in darkness. The launch of my Kickstarter for my album, Confident Hope, exemplifies both of these states in spades. I’m only a couple days into it and I’m amazed how I can at once feel such elated confidence and excitement, and also be so completely in the dark and have no idea how this month might go.
Although it’s far from my default response to powerlessness, I like imagining responding to the unknowns with Elisha’s grace: “Hm, the Lord’s hiding [this or that] from me.” And following that with a determination to act in the present (“The Lord’s got this; let’s go heal that child.”) rather than churn over how the past could have been different (“Why did I even think that asking that woman to have a child was a good idea!?!?”) or worry about the future (“Oh man, if giving her a child resulted in having that child die, even if I heal this kid, what’s next? It could be real bad.”)
And so, here I am! I’ve launched a Kickstarter to support and build community around the creation of my album, Confident Hope. I have felt the Lord’s hand in this from so early on, and so I am determined to “fulfill what I’ve vowed” (Eccles. 5:4).
I would love to have you along for the ride! Backing my project on Kickstarter is the best way to stay in touch about the growth and progress of my album.